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Attempt to Dismiss Child Support Payment Lawsuit
The process of divorce is very complicated because of the emotions that must be dealt with while all of the legal and financial issues are being resolved. Children can make divorce more stressful, especially when determining visitation and child support.
When parents are not married though, but do split up and agree to support payments, it becomes more complicated because the support may not be in a legal decree, like divorce papers.
Just a few weeks ago, a man filed a claim in the Illinois courts accusing a woman of collecting child support payments from him for a child that is not his. Lekardo Pitts claimed that he spent thousands of dollars on child support payments to Edwardstine Reese only to discover that he is not her child’s biological father.
He claimed that Reese led him to believe that he had fathered the child in order to receive payments.
Just after his claim was filed, Reese filed a motion to dismiss the accusation. Reese claimed that Pitts had an opportunity to contest paternity of the child in 2004, before the payments began, and he did not take it.
Types of Spousal Support
As is often the case in divorce disputes, the judge must determine whether a spouse is obligated to pay or receive spousal support. To make this determination, an Illinois divorce judge will look at the circumstances surrounding the marriage, like the parties’ professional achievements, any children they had, the length of the marriage, the income gap (if any) between the parties, the needs of each party, the standard of living during the marriage, age, sex, etc. Illinois gives judges wide latitude when it comes to determining spousal support.
For example, an advanced educational degree that one spouse earns during the marriage, enabling that party to command a higher salary, is considered to be, in part, due to the marital efforts, which entitles the other spouse to some form of compensation. Illinois has three type of spousal support.
Divorcing Successfully
Not all divorces are knock down drag out fights. Divorce is simply the ending of one relationship and the beginning of a different type of relationship. According to Psychology Today, having a good divorce outcome is possible. Here are a few tips to help make the transition easier.
Take your Time
You are both going to have feelings of loss and the change is going to throw your emotions for a loop. Don’t try to be friends with your ex right away. You need to come to terms with the end of the marriage and you need to give yourselves time to grieve. Whether the marriage ended after six months or twenty years, you have to take the time out that you need from the other person.
Do Not Repeat Patterns
Now that you are divorced, you are no longer emotionally responsible for your ex. While you may have spent years dealing with the things that made them insecure, listening to their work woes, and consoling them about issues with their family, that is not your job anymore. You are no longer their platform to unload and they are not yours. Do not fall into the same patterns that existed in the marriage. This will only stifle the new relationship that you may have.
Enforcing a Divorce Decree
Getting a divorce decree is only one of the first steps of life after divorce. However, a properly drafted and well-executed divorce decree is crucial to the long-term relationship between former spouses and children. The divorce decree is the backbone on which parental rights and obligations depend.
Take a divorce in which the parties settled before trial, for example. In these types of divorces, a properly executed decree will incorporate a marital settlement agreement that specifies spousal support obligations, as well as division of personal and real property. If there are children involved, the decree will also contain a joint parenting agreement that details who has custody, visitation and other child-related obligations.
These two documents serve as an important guide for the parties during divorce. More importantly, they allow a party to seek the court’s help if the other party does not play by the rules. If the husband, for example, violates the divorce decree by not following the visitation schedule or failing to make child support payments, the mother may file a petition for a Rule to Show Cause. This means that the aggrieved party is asking the court to force the other party to comply with the decree.
Overweight People Less Likely to Divorce
There have been some surprising findings about divorce throughout the last couple of years. One such thing was a Norwegian study that found that couples who share housework are more likely to divorce—a troubling finding in a world where women are only just beginning to play an equal role out of the home. A Swedish study found that there may actually be a gene in women that can predict divorce, as if some women are just predetermined to split, regardless of socioeconomic or family background. And just recently, a report first published by MyDivorcePapers.com, and reported on by the Huffington Post, “couples whose individual weights fall between 101 and 200 pounds are more likely to file for divorce.” 
Child Custody in Illinois
Determining who gets custody of the child and how visitation will work out after divorce is one of the most difficult processes that any divorcing couple with kids must undergo. Tensions are already running high in a divorce, and when kids are involved this becomes all the more trying. The specifics of custody laws and visitation rights vary by state. In any situation, the most important first step if you’re considering divorce—especially if you have kids—is to contact a divorce attorney. An attorney will be able to walk you through the steps you’re going to have to take, and can help you resolve the divorce in a way that could actually be beneficial to you or your family. In Illinois, a judge makes a decision about child custody based on what “he or she think is in the child’s best interest,” according to WomensLaw.org.
Not The Sad Breakup It Used to Be—Divorce Parties
With divorce rates hovering at just about 50 percent, the stigma of divorce seems to be waning in the U.S. According to the Center for Disease Control, in 2010 the marriage rate was 6.8 per 1,000 total population in the nation, while the divorce rate hovered at just slightly more than half of that, at 3.6 per 1,000 population. Nevada, Maine, and Oklahoma have the highest divorce rates in the country, according to StatisticBrain.com, while Illinois actually has one of the lowest—9.5 percent of marriages in 2010 ended in divorce in Illinois, while Nevada ranked in at 14.2 percent. These numbers are significantly higher across the board than they’ve even been before in America. Some sociologists accredit this to our changing attitudes about traditional family structure, while others attribute it to prosperity or feminine independence. Either way, with the number of divorces comes a shifting attitude in its acceptability. 
Ways to Make a Divorce Less Stressful
Divorce is a stressful event in anyone’s life. It does not just affect the two exes involved but can ripple through whole families. Kids are especially affected by the consequences of a divorce. In order to keep the hassles of a divorce to a minimum, there are a couple of different methods you can employ to lower the stress.
The first advice is to acknowledge the cause of your divorce but avoid pointing fingers. Look towards the things that you would stress your relationship such as financial issues, bad habits, drug use, or other things. By understanding the things that set you off, you can try to limit how it affects you.
Also notice how you would communicate to your spouse and what is deficient about that communication. Use that information to guide show you how to act more collaboratively while seeking a divorce. That can mean learning how to communicate with your ex in a constructive manner in which you can explain what you feel without being angry or hurtful.
Courage A Critical Factor In Divorce, Study Says
A recent study from Slater & Gordon finds that although there are a myriad of reasons that couples choose to obtain a divorce, courage is one of the strongest factors in actually taking the step towards legal action. A majority of people choosing not to move forward with divorce action hesitated as a result of lack of courage.
Reasons for seeking divorce varied among men and women, not surprisingly. Women reported that financial issues in the marriage and a lack of “fun” were leading reasons for their interest in divorce, while men noted dissatisfaction with their sex lives as a leading cause. For both genders however, a lack of courage was named as the number one reason holding individuals back from contacting an attorney and setting the divorce wheels in motion.
Men and women, however, cited different hesitations about taking the divorce plunge: men were concerned about the impact on the family unit while women worried more about the financial complications that divorce could cause. One quarter of couples noted that they chose to stay together for the benefit of the children. In some scenarios, though, staying together might also be negative for the children, especially if parents are fighting constantly. In these cases, divorce might be challenging, but overall a better outcome for the kids involved.
Divorce Study Shows Link Between Joint Custody and Infant Caregiver Attachment
A recent study released by the University of Virginia found that infants who spent one night or more each week away from their mothers had less secure bonds with those mothers. Babies who spent more time with their mothers or those who stayed with a father during the day had more secure attachments to the mother. The impacts of divorce and custody arrangements can reach out even to infants.
The study was conducted using data from the Fragile Families and Child Wellbeing Study. The study is a longitudinal collection of data from 5,000 children in big cities across the U.S. between 1998 and 2000. The data was collected by using interviews with parents of the children starting at birth, and then again at ages 1 and 3. Researcher Samantha Tornello, the lead author for the study, says that link between attachment in infancy and healthy relationships into adulthood is a strong one.
