Posted on September 14, 2016 in Guardian ad Litem

When you are embroiled in a difficult divorce, it can be nearly impossible to work cooperatively with your soon-to-be ex-spouse. Every aspect of the proceedings may seem like a fight with almost zero chance of reaching a negotiated resolution. While fighting over money and marital property is certainly bad enough, the problems get even worse when there are children involved. That is why the law in Illinois provides the court with the authority to appoint an attorney specifically to protect a child’s best interest in any matter related to parental responsibilities (child custody), parenting time, non-parental visitation, child support, or any other child-related legal proceeding.

Protecting the Child’s Best Interests

The court may appoint an attorney to serve in one of three roles: an attorney for the child, a child representative, or a guardian ad litem. Of these, the child representative and the guardian ad litem are the most commonly used and the guardian ad litem is usually the most appropriate for younger children.

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 Posted on September 12, 2016 in Parental Relocation

It is easy to understand how such a situation could arise. You and your spouse divorced several years ago, and, while the process was not easy, you managed to reach a reasonable agreement that addressed not only your property and finances but arrangements for your children as well. Based on your circumstances and what was best for your children, you were granted primary residential responsibilities while the other parent was afforded ample visitation time. Things could always be a little better, but you realize that you have it pretty good overall. Your children are happy and healthy, and enjoy a strong relationship with both you and your former spouse.

Then, one day at work you are taken by surprise when your boss offers you a substantial promotion—but there is a catch. To take the new position, you will need to move away from Northern Illinois to your company’s headquarters in Dallas, Texas. On a professional level, there is no way you can turn down such an opportunity, but, as a parent subject to a parenting plan or child custody order, the decision is not so simple.

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 Posted on September 07, 2016 in Divorce

Have you been thinking about filing for divorce? Has it been nagging at you with a feeling of inevitability that you cannot shake? If so, you are not alone. Most people who eventually decide to get a divorce do so only after months—sometimes years—of painful deliberation and waiting for the right time. This means that, at any given time, there are probably thousands of unhappy spouses thinking about ending their marriages throughout the country. Interestingly, many of them will wait to make their ultimate decision until after a holiday season, leading to the development of two rather distinct divorce seasons each year.

Semiannual Spikes

Researchers from the University of Washington examined divorce filings in Washington state for nearly a decade and a half, from 2001 to 2015. The research team discovered that there was an unmistakable increase in divorce filings each year in the months of March and August. The team presented their findings at the annual meeting of the American Sociological Association last month and suggested that the spike in filings in these months may be the result of a “domestic ritual” calendar that affects family behavior.

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 Posted on August 31, 2016 in Child Custody and Support

While the warm weather has not yet faded into the chill of autumn, school is back in session for children throughout the country, including here in Kane County. Long days full of recreation, trips to amusement parks, camping adventures, and other outdoor activities have been replaced with books, assignments, notes, and an educational focus. The transition back into school mode can be challenging for virtually any child, but the situation is often even more complicated for a child of divorce. If you are divorced and your child is struggling with the change of season, there are some things that you and the other parent can do to help make things a little easier.

Talk

It should come as little surprise to see communication at the top of a list regarding how to help your child. You cannot know what to do or that anything even needs to be done unless and until you talk to your child and find out where he or she may be struggling. You should also take the time to speak with your child’s teachers and school administrators, both to keep them abreast of your child’s needs and to gain their valuable input into how to meet your child’s needs. Finally, do not be afraid to communicate with your child’s other parent. Regardless of your past relationship, you need to be a team now more than ever and to help prevent small problems in school from becoming big ones.

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 Posted on August 30, 2016 in Divorce

Approaching divorce with the right perspective is often much easier said than done, but when you are able to look at the end of your marriage through a positive lens, the outcome is generally healthier and less stressful for everyone involved. Grief and healing are processes that inevitably take time, but when you channel your energy into staying focused on new beginnings that will result from the separation, the road to peace and acceptance is less bumpy.

Here are three ways to help yourself develop a positive perspective on divorce:

1. Cut Your Losses

Whether it is material possessions, bank accounts, or impending vacation plans that you made with your soon-to-be ex-spouse, one way to create a positive spin on divorce is to let go and know when to throw in the towel. Money and possessions are often mediums that couples use to take out all of their frustration, hurt, and anger, as using these things as weapons gives them the power to affect their partner. Instead of adding fuel to the fire and contributing to the storm, choose to compromise when it comes to money and belongings or make the decision to walk away completely.

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 Posted on August 29, 2016 in Divorce

The months and even years after a divorce can be rough. You are redefining yourself as a single person after being one half of a couple. Depending on how long you were married, it has possibly been a long time since you dated. Soon after a divorce the prospect of finding a new partner or “getting back out there” may be daunting. It is important to realize that you do not have to start dating again until you are ready.

Mental health and relationship professionals agree that individuals should give themselves time to mourn the loss of their marriage just as they would mourn a physical loss. How will you know if you are ready? There are a few clues experts say to look for, including:

• You Stop Ruminating About the Past: There will never be a time that you forget about your ex-spouse completely but thinking of him or her less often is a sign that you are healing emotionally. In the immediate aftermath of a divorce you may be consumed with thoughts about your former partner, feeling emotions like anger, sadness, and disbelief. You may fantasize about how things could have been different in your relationship. Many people find that these feelings and thoughts diminish with time. Eventually, you will be ready to stop living in the past and instead live in the present and look forward to the future.

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 Posted on August 22, 2016 in Child Custody and Support

Even if they do not feel morally obligated to do so, parents of children have a legal obligation to provide financial support. This applies when a couple divorces, legally separates, or even if they were never married. If you are a parent in the state of Illinois about to go through a divorce or legal separation or have a child outside of marriage the following information can help you understand the basics of how this obligation to provide support may apply to your situation, and how it is determined.

Child Support in Divorce or Legal Separation

When two parents are married and then decide to divorce or legally separate, they must also go through several legal processes that involve the welfare of their child. These include the allocation of parental responsibilities, assignment of parenting time, and determination of child support. Of those, the child support determination is often the most straightforward. However, it can be just as filled with contention as other aspects of the divorce since child support may be – at least in part - determined in relation to the amount of parenting time each parent receives.  Other factors that may be considered could include:

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 Posted on August 17, 2016 in Divorce

Financial infidelity can be devastating to a marriage. When a spouse lies about financial decisions or makes big decisions without consulting the other it not only takes an emotional toll but can also lead to serious financial hardship for the family in the future. A recent study released by the National Endowment for Financial Education showed that 31% of Americans have lied about money to their spouse, and financial concerns are among the leading causes for divorce around the country.

What Does Financial Infidelity Look Like?

Financial Infidelity can take many forms. If your spouse is being deceitful about money, you may notice that:

• Cash or valuable objects have gone missing;
• He or she opened credit cards and hid the receipts;
• Unexplained purchases have appeared in the house;
• He or she gets defensive or angry in response to questions about money

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 Posted on August 15, 2016 in Divorce

There are many steps to complete when it comes ending your marriage. There is marital property to divide, assets to consider, retirement plans to change, credit cards to open, and bank accounts to close. If you have children, there are additional, and often more emotional considerations regarding custody, parenting plans, and visitation rights.

You may also have other things to consider—who will keep the family pet? When can the ex-spouse still visit with and carry on a relationship with in-laws? Is it possible to still share a group of friends? These are all considerations that will need to be made at the personal discretion of the divorcing couple. While a legal professional can help with concrete processes, of course, including financial decisions and property division, he or she will only be able to offer solicited advice when it comes to the more personal aspects of marital dissolution.

Filing for Divorce

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 Posted on August 10, 2016 in Divorce

If you are thinking about filing for divorce, you probably realize that you will need to file your petition at the county courthouse. For many people, however, there are questions as to which county is appropriate. According to the law in Illinois, there are specific guidelines for choosing the right venue for your divorce, but you may have several options.

Basic Expectations

The Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage Act provides that the proceedings for a divorce in Illinois should be held “in the county where the plaintiff or defendant resides.” If you and your spouse both live in Kane County, then your divorce, barring unusual circumstances, should take place in the circuit court of Kane County. If you live in Kane County but your spouse has moved to DuPage County, your divorce could be handled by the court of either county. In any case, a county court judge may direct your process to any other county in the state as needed.

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